Funny stories about food, parts 4 & 5

"According to a recent article on nutrition, eating right doesn't have to be complicated. Nutritionists say to use colors as a guide. Simply fill your plates bright colors... greens, reds, and yellows. Well, that's exactly what I did this morning. For breakfast, I had an entire bowl of M&M's. I never knew eating right could be so easy!"



"A young man saw an elderly couple sitting down to lunch at Burger King. He noticed that they ordered one meal and an extra cup. As he watched, the gentleman carefully divided the hamburger in half and then counted out the fries -- one for him, one for her, until they each had half on them. Then he poured half of the soft drink into the extra cup and set it in front of his wife. As the old man began to eat, his wife just sat watching with her hands folded in her lap. The young man asked if they would allow him to purchase another meal for them so they didn't have to split theirs. The old gentleman said, "Oh, no. We've been married 50 years, and everything has always been - and always will be - shared, fifty-fifty" The young man then asked the wife if she was going to eat, and she replied "Not yet, It's his turn to use the teeth.""

Funny stories about food, part 2 & 3

"Did you know that chocolate, in its purest form, contains cocoa and sugar? Cocoa comes from cocoa beans. Beans are vegetables. Sugar is derived from either sugar cane or sugar beets, both of which are plants. This also places them in the vegetable category. Therefore, CHOCOLATE MUST BE A VEGETABLE!"

(This was submitted by a vegetarian!)

"Ham & Eggs -- It's a day's work for a chicken, but a lifetime commitment for a pig."

Funny stories about food part 1

I was reading a 'Gaither Homecoming Magazine' the other night, and it had a page of "Now that's funny" food stories some of their readers had shared, and I thought it would be fun to share with you one of those stories a day... or whenever I get to it... :-)
So, here's the first one...

"Every week at our house, we have what we call "Family-Night-Pizza-Night-Movie-Night." My daughters, Carolina (11) and Olivia (8), and I make homemade pizza, create a huge mess for Momma to clean up in the kitchen, and then we all watch a movie together while feasting on our pizza. One night, our daughters were arguing over who would get the first piece. I saw this as an opportunity for a lesson, so I said "If Jesus were here, He would say 'I can wait. Let my sister have the first piece'" Carolina quickly turned to Olivia and said "Ok, you be Jesus!"